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6 January, 2006
Dear Diary,
Could not imagine a more curious game of golf than the one I played this afternoon. I was playing a full 18 holes with a rather rich chap I’d just met. He proposed a bit of a wager on the game which I was happy to accept, confident of my skills. Well, it got right down to the wire. My opponent was admittedly quite a good player. I ended up winning merely to a minute detail. He yielded, but he seemed to be a bit crabby.
11 January, 2006
Dear Diary,
I have often read that the Great Pyramids of Giza are a wondrous site, but I never realised just how awesome they truly are until tonight, when I saw them for myself. They played a historical movie, but I was more interested in the view anyway. To be frank, I didn’t find the movie terribly entertaining at all, but my perception may have been tainted by the man and woman behind me who just wouldn’t stop talking. Luckily, he left before I had to turn around and ask them to pipe down.
17 January, 2006
Dear Diary,
Little could I know I would see such a bewitching piece of art today. I attended an auction this afternoon. One of the featured pieces, and the one about which I speak, was a Russian work, one of a set of fifty. While I’m sure the other forty-nine are just as fragile and lovely, I have never seen a finer piece of jewellery.
22 January, 2006
Dear Diary,
Light shows are ok, but when you compare them to the show I saw today in Paris they pale. I was meeting with a business associate at a restaurant, and there was a butterfly show going on! I wasn’t paying much attention, but my associate seemed very taken with the little insects. I guess they weren’t as well trained as we thought though, because one of them flew at my dinner partner as if to attack him. He appeared distressed; the ordeal must have been overwhelming, but it was certainly the most memorable part of the show.
3 February, 2006
Dear Diary,
To take a family member to the mortuary is always a sad thing, but that’s just what I did today. The hearse picked me up as I arrived in Las Vegas, and I sat in the front between the driver and a coworker of his. My brother’s casket was (obviously) in the rear of the hearse. When we arrived at the funeral parlour he was cremated… I’m not really sure how I should react.
7 February, 2006
Dear Diary,
Even we are not safe, it seems, being one of the most powerful nations in the world! There was a big press conference about it today-- one of our ships was torpedoed. Honestly, I find it kind of impressive that someone would actually have the guts to attack OUR navy. According to the networks, the ship was sunk by Chinese shots.
22 February, 2006
Dear Diary,
Once in a while I can be known to do something out of the ordinary… that’s certainly the case today. I’ve been on a Caribbean island with an inclination toward voodoo and the occult, and that’s never really been anything I’ve paid any mind to. Nevertheless, today I went to a tarot reader to have my fortune foretold. Good things must lie ahead because the card “The Lovers” seemed to predominate in a manner that was almost absolute.
7 March, 2006
Dear Diary,
Oh boy, again with the health issues. My boss has asked that I go to a “health farm.” Naturally, the steam baths and the massages are quite soothing, but I really don't feel that I can stay away from the job that long. I tried to complain to my boss, but to no avail-- he insists.
22 March, 2006
Dear Diary,
So much for fun in the sun. As much as I like extreme sports, I think I have to draw the line here. I decided to windsurf a bit today. The water, however, was very brisk; it was probably the coldest water on which I've engaged in any aquatic activity. I'm just glad I didn't fall in or I might be struck with a bit more than a melancholy. It will be awhile before I do that afresh.
26 March, 2006
Dear Diary,
Now here's something you don't see everyday... I got closed up inside a Murphy bed. There I was in bed, enjoying myself, when suddenly it folded up into the wall taking me right along with it. I didn't think that happened in real life, but was merely a gag in a movie or a story.
7 April, 2006
Dear Diary,
The last time I was this fed up with my boss, I almost resigned, but luckily my secretary convinced me to take two weeks off instead. Well, this time I really did it. I quit. A close friend and coworker was injured, and the company did a dreadfully poor job of handling the matter. As an indirect result, I turned in my badge, so to speak. I just can’t work for them right now because they don’t seem to see my side.
16 April, 2006
Dear Diary,
Ever notice that you can never manage to avoid trouble? Like it comes looking for you everywhere you go. I was on the train today when some bloke held me at gunpoint. I told him I had my money in my briefcase, so he opened it up to take my hard-earned quid. I hope this is the last time I see that guy.
26 April, 2006
Dear Diary,
Recently, I have been sent to delve into a major accident. A pipe literally exploded, shutting down the local workings until it can be repaired. As long as the pipe is out of order, clients have been forced to seek their services in other places.
6 May, 2006
Dear Diary,
Death still bothers me. I mean, I know the proverbial “big sleep” better than most, but I was unprepared for what faced me today. I was driving along the coast when I saw a beautiful woman just walking into the sea. She didn’t look like she planned to come back. Probably languishing in her woes. I drove down to the shore and dove in after her; as I said I’m no stranger to death, but I’m not about to let a belle like that get so suicidal.
11 May, 2006
Dear Diary,
Suddenly, my loving nature is again beyond my control. I have been struck by one of Cupid’s magic arrows. The vision of beauty who has ensnared me this time was on the beach this very day. She was wearing a white bikini as she emerged from the surf, and she wondered if I was looking for seashells (I assured her I was not.) I hope I get to see her again soon, because I will be gone before I realise.
16 May, 2006
Dear Diary,
Now, I adore a prelude as much as the next guy, specifically a well-played one. But there was something about the pianist I met today that seemed a bit off. He was playing Chopin’s “Raindrop” in D flat, and playing it well. The music was excellent, but the performer seemed like a rather unpleasant person.
22 May, 2006
Dear Diary,
Today I ran into somebody I used to work with. He clearly remembered me and was less than happy to see me. We got into rather a large fight, but fortunately I kept my cool and when I walked away from it I was in a much better position than he was.
7 June, 2006
Dear Diary,
Fun is not the way I would describe the funhouse I was in today. It was a hall of mirrors style building, and the lights were rather dim. I was having a bit of trouble finding my way around, and actually wondered for a while if I would make it out at all, but after gathering my senses I was able to find the exit gate.
10 June, 2006
Dear Diary,
Every time I watch an orchestra play I find something new that I really like. Today, it was a pretty cellist. She’s Russian, and I must admit I am quite taken with her. I am very attracted to the sheen of her blonde hair and the nimbleness her fingers must have to play the strings so well. I’ll have to get to know her better sometime.
22 June, 2006
Dear Diary,
As I was climbing a rather sheer cliff face today, I received quite a jump. A bird flew out of the crags! Almost scared me to death! And quite literally too, because if I had fallen from that height it could kill me (if the pitons didn’t hold.) The bird startled my friends below as well. I managed to shake it off and continue my treacherous ascent up the cliff.