To see the solution to this puzzle, change the .php to .txt
"Where did everything go? Curiouser and curiouser..."
A(10)
B(15)
C(9)
D(14)
E(15)
F(8)
G(12)
H(12)
I(14)
C5 B13 I7 D2 H11 D14 C8 B1 F1 G2 E13 A4 H5 I10 G10 A5 F7 E6
(With a friendly tip of the hat and wave of the sword to Erik Hermansen)